Wake Up, Look Up

[Music]

hello everyone thanks for listening to

wake up lookup a podcast where we

connect events happening in real time to

the Gospel of Jesus Christ I'm Zach

wrock in today's episode we're asking

the question will I ever be a

grandparent this is prompted by an

article I read in the New York Times

recently that looked at the decline

of adults having children uh but it

didn't look at it from the perspective

of uh husband and wife or uh two people

in their 20s or 30s deciding whether or

not to have kids it actually looked at

it from the perspective of their parents

who are now realizing they may never be

grandparents this is actually a growing

cultural Trend and it's something we've

talked about on wake up lookup before

the increasing uh decline in childbirth

rates and the implications that has for

society but here's another way of

looking at it in 2021 studies showed

that just over half of people over the

age of 50 had at least one grandkid and

now that sounds like a lot right a

little over 50% but that number is

actually a 10% decline from the same

study done in

2014 less and less adults are having

kids which means less and less elderly

adults are experiencing getting to be a

grandparent and this is producing some

negative feelings in the generation that

thought they would be stepping into

grandparenthood in the next few years it

it can lead to feelings of isolation I

mean after all it would be pretty uh

difficult to sit at a table and listen

to your peers talk about time with their

grandkids when you don't have any and

may never have any it can also lead to

broken relationships between parents and

their children as the younger generation

lets mom and dad know hey we're not

having kids and you're not going to be a

grandparent it can lead to feelings of

resentment and bitterness uh this is

something we have to be thinking and

talking about because statistically this

is going to affect some of the people

listening to this podcast there going to

be some of you listening whose children

may have told you uh they're not going

to have kids you're not going to be a

grandparent there may be others

listening to this episode who are

younger saying hey we're actually

thinking about not having kids so how do

we think about this trend from a

Biblical perspective and the answer to

that is really two things and they're

going to sound paradoxical and that's

okay because sometimes what the Bible's

asking us to do isn't easy uh first for

those who are having to face the fortune

of not being grandparents those in their

50s 60s and 70s realizing they will

never have that experience it's

important to remember that the biblical

concept of love is not a response to

people who give us what we want in other

words we don't love our kids because

they give us grandkids we don't love our

kids because they meet our expectations

they live life according to our pattern

I mean look I want to be a grandparent

it would be pretty devastating if none

of my kids decided to have kids but love

is ultimately about me serving them not

the other way around of course we need

to go no further than Jesus for this

Jesus told us greater love has no man

than this that he laid down his life for

his friends not love is what you give

your friends when they lay down their

lives for you we have to love our

children irrespective of what they do

for us if your children are telling you

hey we're not going to have kids that's

hard but it should not affect the way

you love them and if it has that is not

fundamentally about them that's

fundamentally about you and I in the

self-centered way we contend to love

each other however if you're on the

younger end of this and you're thinking

maybe about not having kids I would just

challenge you with this I I hope you

know on wake up lookup I stop short of

trying to label things as Sin that the

Bible has not labeled as Sin so I'm not

going to do that I'm not going to tell

you that having children if you're

married is a righteousness issue but I

will say this when the Bible talks about

marriage it always talks about kids this

is always true uh of the biblical

picture of marriage but it's true even

in the beginning in Genesis 2 when God

gives Eve to Adam and Adam to Eve he

tells them to be fruitful and multiply

that part of what it means for them to

be human part of what it means for them

to be married is that not just that they

would enjoy sexual intimacy but that

that sexual intimacy would lead to

procreation in the Bible when marriage

doesn't result in children it's usually

a sign of Brokenness it's a sign it's a

cause for lament and mourning and for

crying out for God's intervention be

wary of constructing a view of marriage

and a view of family that is outside the

bounds of what the Bible has described

children are a blessing and we got to

make sure that our perspective on kids

isn't being shaped by Society by culture

or even by our own selfish desires but

all that to say uh let's make sure we're

talking to each other one generation to

the next let's make sure we're saying we

love you no matter what choices you make

and let's make sure we're hearing that

maybe our original plan is outside of

what God wants for us communication is

the key to healthy relationships

especially when tough things are being

discussed hey thanks so much for

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